Weaning and Bedtime

Tuesday, May 26th, 2009 8:02pm

Tonight I stood in the doorway of my little girl’s room with tears streaming as I peeked in trying to watch my little girl playfully put herself to sleep for the night. I’ve joyfully anticipated this day, and now that it’s here I’m as grateful as I imagined I would be, but sadder then I expected. My little girl now sleeps 11 hours at night (going on the 3rd week!) and goes to sleep for bedtime and naps quite peacefully. She practically puts herself down anymore, whining until I lay her down and crying if I stay in the room too long. This is exactly what I trained her for, but I forgot to train myself! She has weaned herself from nursing, finding life too exciting to sit still and feed from Mom. Tonight, I tried to rock her, sing, pray and snuggle, as is our nightly ritual, but she reached for her crib and looked as though she would dive in to it! I set her down and she immediately grabbed her little pink dog and laid herself down on her tummy. No cries, no reaching for mom, just a peaceful, big girl laying down to sleep through the night—on her own. I’m so proud of her. Yet, so sad. My little girl grows so quickly. I never expected to feel my heart bursting with love, pride, and heartache when my little girl is only 9 months! I know, it’s painful to imagine me sending her to college! I recognize how pitiful I am. Sure, I don’t miss the screaming and crying or the midnight, 3 o’clock, 5 o’clock, etc. feedings, but I sure do miss the snuggles. Maybe they’ll return, maybe not, all I know is that in the midst of all the sleepless nights and difficult moments I’m glad I always remembered to enjoy the snuggles I had for a season. Her giggles, smiles, hugs, cries, coos, well, all of it is precious. Thank you, Lord, for my little girl.

Thank you for allowing this hormonal momma her musings. If you made it to the end, bless you!

Confession: I definitely (husbands idea) snuck into her room a few hours later, picked her up, and brought her to bed for 20 minutes of snuggle time. She stayed asleep through it all--completely worth it.

Another note: Ivory awoke at 5:30am crying. All she wanted was snuggles from mom and then she fell right back to sleep. {sweet sigh} I guess she does need me after all.